It’s about time, that I show you guys my results of the last one and a half years. I think this will be shocking to those of you, who have never done cold approach pickup. So far, I’ve mostly written about my success stories, but not about all the hardship, all the flakes (so many!), and the blue balls I’ve gone through.
Well here it finally is, the raw truth.
Obviously, there will still be a lot of change happening in 2018, as I have just gotten into daygame again properly. My goal is to have collected 200 numbers by the end of the year. That’s still another 77 to go, in two and a half months. Easy – one number a day.
App – Approaches
Nc – Number Close
I-D – Instant Date
1st D – First Date
2nd D – Second Date
3rd D – Third Date
Kc – Kiss Close
BJ/HJ – Blowjob/Handjob
L – Lay
You will have noticed, that most of my stats have improved:
I am approaching fewer girls to get a number.
In 2017 I had to talk to 4,57 girls on average, to get one phone number. This has decreased to 2,96 girls in 2018. There are a couple of reasons for this.
First of all I have become more confident in approaching girls outside of daygame sessions. In the past, if I hadn’t fully committed to doing a session of ten approaches, I wouldn’t be able to speak to one single girl. Nowadays, I can go and talk to girls basically any time of the day. I can jump right into it and don’t need to push myself as hard as I used to. This also means, that many of these interactions have become more “natural”. I believe that the girls I used to approach on a busy Saturday morning in downtown must have gotten the impression, that I did that all the time. However, when I speak to a girl in a grocery store near my suburb, it probably comes across a lot more random and spontaneous.
Another reason could be, that I am talking a lot lower and slower. Now obviously, this was just a matter of practice. When I was living in Calgary for a year, one of my favorite late night activities was to go and sing karaoke. Doing this multiple times a month, combined with my job as a fundraiser, must have had a big impact on my voice volume and pitch. Often we’d be fundraising right next to the train stations in downtown. We would have to be louder than the train, or our potential donor would lose interest and leave the conversation. Slowing down my voice hasn’t just had an effect on the girls I’ve been speaking too, but it has also given me more time to think about the things I was going to say next.
Lastly, the top reason for my number close ratio, is the fact that I just close stronger. I will say my usual line “Listen, I think you’re really attractive and I’d like to take you out for a drink another time”, while I’m pulling out my phone. I have become so comfortable with this move, that hardly any girl doesn’t give me her number, once we’ve gotten to that point in the interaction. Even if a girl didn’t hook in the conversation, I will still ask her for her number. This leads me to the one statistic, which hasn’t improved since last year.
My number to date ratio.
The number of girls coming out on a date has decreased by more than 40% since last year. Again, there are a few reasons for this.
One of them I just mentioned above. Many of the girls have felt pressured to give me their number, because I have gotten so confident in asking them for it. I still remember one of my daygame sessions in Vancouver, where I had gotten eight numbers from eleven approaches. That’s a 72,5% close ratio. But, guess what. Non of them replied to my opening text.
Secondly, I wasn’t grounding the conversations. By that I mean, that I wasn’t telling the girls anything about myself. Instead I would only get them to talk, or if they asked me a question, I would answer in a funny and cocky way. It would get them to laugh, but in the end they would feel like they knew nothing about me.
Also, the interactions were too short. The ideal daygame set lies somewhere between five and ten minutes, as the girl will feel like she didn’t get to know you, or simply forget the approach, if it was shorter than five minutes. On the other side, if it was longer than ten minutes, it can get too comfortable, and she could stick you in the friend zone right away.
Let’s look at the last stat that improved.
My date to lay ratio.
I think this one is pretty straight forward. Through all the dating experience I’ve gained, I have learned things to say and things to do, that will increase my chances of sleeping with the girl. I’ve learned how to escalate verbally and physically, and that has prevented me from sitting there, not knowing how to lead up to the kiss or the bounce back home.
I have learned, that a girl is far more likely to sleep with me, if I escalate fast. I now know, that it’s better for me to keep my mouth shut and let her do most of the talking, than trying to come up with funny stories that just come across as me trying too hard.
All the dates have taught me, that I don’t always have to take a girl for a coffee, then a drink, and then try to bounce her back to my place, but that there are many roads which lead to Rome (or to my home).
After analysing this data, it is clear to me what my sticking points are, and what I need to work on. I want to encourage all of you, to also keep track of your results. It may seem stupid in the moment, but one day it could teach you a thing or two.